1. How many poems about Dick Cheney
can I send at a time?
2. How often can I submit a poem
about Dick Cheney?
3. Do you accept previously published poems
written about Dick Cheney?
4. Do you accept simultaneously submitted
poems written about Dick Cheney?
5. What rights do you ask for when you
accept a poem about Dick Cheney?
6. Are you strictly someone who only likes
poems about Dick Cheney?
7. What do you mean by all poems written about
Dick Cheney are subject to editing?
8. Why don't you accept poems written about Donald
Rumsfeld?
9. Do you pay for the poems written about
Dick Cheney that are accepted?
10. I received a letter saying I have made it past
the first round of Dick Cheney poems. What does
that mean?
11. How quickly can you get back to me
about my poems written about Dick Cheney?
12. What kinds of poems about Dick Cheney
do you accept?
13. Do you accept one act plays about Dick Cheney?
14. Do you accept dirty limericks written about Dick
Cheney?
15. Do you accept poems written based on photos
of Dick Cheney?
16. If I do not have any previously published poems
about Dick Cheney to list, can I still submit?
17. How can I be a guest editor of poems written
about Dick Cheney?
18. Where are your poems written about Dick Cheney
based?
19. Do you comment on the Dick Cheney poems
that are rejected?
20. How short or long can my poems about Dick Cheney
be?
21. Do you accept rhyming verse about Dick Cheney?
22. Do you accept religious verse about Dick Cheney?
23. Do you accept translated poems written about Dick
Cheney?
24. Do you accept poems written about
Condoleeza Rice?
25. What authors do you believe exemplify what you
are looking for in a poem written about Dick Cheney?
The face of Monica Lewinsky looking sad
in her navy blue dress
The face of Monica Lewinsky when she sits
down and rips her navy blue dress
The face of Monica Lewinsky when she is wearing
her powerful navy blue dress that turns the heads
of vulgar construction workers
The faces of cops laughing at Monica Lewinsky in her
navy blue dress
Faces of small animals wrapped in Monica Lewinsky's
navy blue dress
Rich, plastic faces of women spending money
on Monica Lewinsky's infamous navy blue dress put
up for auction
Vicious faces of dogs running after Monica Lewinsky
in her navy blue dress
Made up faces of crossdressers wearing navy blue dresses
and caring automatic hand guns
Sweaty faces of people wearing navy blue dresses in an
office with a broken air conditioner.
Faces of women burning navy blue dresses in protest
Drag queens wearing dark wigs and navy blue dresses
Faces of lawyers cringing to the sight of Monica
Lewinsky's navy blue dress
Faces of horny hockey players drooling when Monica
Lewinsky walks by in her navy blue dress
The face of Monica Lewinsky when her panties fall down
around her ankles from beneath her navy blue dress
The face Monica Lewinsky makes when her mother tells her
to take off that damn navy blue dress
Recently I saw a picture of Bill & Hilary Clinton
on the cover of a birthday card in Barnes and Noble.
I made a mental note to myself to go back and buy
at least four of those cards for the birthdays of friends.
They look like they were born on a farm.
In seeing Hilary now on TV,
on CNN, that child has had some
work done.
Bill seems unsure about something:
Looking like he forgot to wash his hands
I wonder if he ever imagined then
what has happened now?
that he would be president of the United States
or remain a manager at some gas mart in Arkansas?
The White House is a long way from that first apartment
during college with no heat or air-conditioning & roaches
floating dead in a broken toilet of stale piss.
Life for him was a gourmet
peanut butter & jelly sandwich
until Monica came along & set his ass straight.
Explaining that she didn't get this far on grades alone.
She is no amateur when it comes down to oral sex.
I keep fantasizing of this round,
red ring from her lipstick, left at the base of Bill's cock
& he knows this & gets off on it.
The thought of Monica Lewinski's Maybellene
moisture lips marking his penis puts a smile
on his American face.
Does Hil know what's going on between those two?
She hears Bill sneaking in with the help of
secret service agents as she lies on her side
pretending to be asleep.
Bill clicks on the lights in the bathroom
that has been the same color
since the territorial pissings of Jimmy Carter.
He runs a hot shower, scrubs his penis
zestfully clean from lipstick, saliva.
Hilary doesn't make a sound.
Even though she wants to cut off his
dick & stuff it in the very mouth that licked
Monica's cunt, she refuses, pulling the presidential covers
to her chin & falls asleep.
Monica's mother asks,
What is this white stain on your dress?
That's just sugar from a glazed donut
I was eating in the car on my way home, she says.
Being her mother, she believes her.
Even though Newsweek and Dan Rather
says it's semen.
Monica throws the dark blue dress
in the bathtub, grabs Woolite
& squeezes a drop the size of a dime
on the stain & scrubs, 'cause it takes more than
water & soap to get cum stains out of dark blue
dresses.
Bill uses her like a cum towel
until the shit hit the fan
about he & Monica having sexual relations
at the Red Roof Inn.
He confesses his sins at news briefs & press conferences
with a Jimmy Falwell sensitivity.
No one wants to know about Bill's sex life
except Hollywood execs
who want to option his story off for
a made for TV movie.
Hilary better wake up & smell
the Cuban cigars.
Monica has lost weight
& is featured on the cover of Vanity Fair.
I wonder how Chelsea is handling all of this?
She slits her wrists with a carpet cutter
as she lies in her bed of stuffed animals
& a tell-all diary.
Shane Allison has been published in over sixty magazines and journals including online journals such as Gnome and The Doomed City. His first book, Black Fag, will be released by Future Tense Books.