Incontinence, that's the reason for your employment, said the nurse.
Monday, Thursday and Sunday were the days of my employment. I was never late for work.
Dottie and Viv. Skeletal: bones and ligaments. Investigation is under way in New York into allegations that the bones of the late broadcaster Alistair Cooke were stolen before his cremation/I've just been ravished, said Viv. What, just now? Asked Dottie. It was Priapus with his mighty tool/ According to the New York Daily News his bones were stolen by a criminal ring trading body parts/ The rectum ampulla/ anatomically also/ ampulla recti/ acts as a temporary storage facility for the waste material/ As the rectal walls expand due to the materials filling it from within/ stretch receptors from the nervous system located in the rectal walls stimulate the desire to defecate/ circulatory/ he/art/ arteries/ veins/ capillaries/ police fear the thieves may dump the statute due to publicity surrounding its theft from the Perry Green estate in Much Hadham/ Herts/ last Thursday.
Dottie lived in a small house. Viv lived in a mansion. Dottie and Viv lived happily together. Dottie sat antithesis to Viv. Viv sat antithesis to Dottie. Dottie could feel the reek of Viv. Viv could feel the reek of Dottie. Toe to toe they were. Both quaff the rill omnivorously.
That old dog? Asked Dottie. Like a dog/ Digestive/ mouth/ teeth/ throat/ esophagus/ stomach/ liver/ gallbladder/ pancreas/ small and large intestine/ The bronze Reclining Figure sculpture weighs more than two tons and is 11ft in length/When the rectum is full the increase in intrarectal pressure forces the walls of the anal canal apart allowing the fecal matter to enter the canal/ For me it's going to be the other way round/ He will concur/ He always does/ He loves Lucy/ dead monkey brain tabloid fever.
Dottie never laughed. Dottie giggled at Viv, she giggled when discombobulated, melancholy and at scenes of death and destruction. Viv always laughed. Viv mostly laughed when Priapus paid a quick visit. Dottie had a jejune giggle. Viv had a coquettish laugh. They both enjoyed a silly joke. For instance: what is gross stupidity? One hundred men in the same room. Viv would laugh first. Dottie would giggle last. Both enjoyed the puerile.
Bloated are you? Asked Dottie. Didn't finish/ A quick one/ He had to be off/ Respiratory/ nose/ throat/ windpipe/ bronchial tubes/ lungs/ they have been told that body snatchers allegedly surgically removed his bones and sold them for more than £4,000 to a company supplying parts for use in dental implants and various orthopaedic procedures/ off you say/ bloody sharpish/ the urethra opens straight into the vulva/ Because of this/, the urine does not exit at a distance from the body and is/ therefore/ hard to control/ Because of surface tension in the urine/ reward in excess of £5,000 is being offered for the safe return of a £3m Henry Moore sculpture/ nervous/ brain/ spinal cords/ nerves/ no goodbye/ not even a wink.
Catechism was how they conversed. Dottie was concise. Viv loquacious. Dottie was deaf. Viv was once vivacious. Dottie upset Viv and Viv upset Dottie. Dottie chewed her nails. Viv smoked cigarettes. The sound of teeth gnawing on nails. The lunting of nicotine. Dottie would never give in. Viv would never cease. Each overcame ennui in with their pleasures.
The back door? Asked Dottie. Nobody's there/ the back door/ endocrine/ glands/ pituitary/ thyroid/ parathyroid/ adrenal/ island of langerhans/ echoland/ could be melted down and sold as scrap/ I'm most shocked by the violation of the medical ethics/ I'm furious/ I'm enraged/ I'm outraged/ Urinary/ kidneys/ ureters/ bladder/ urethra/ During the menstrual cycle/ the sexually mature female body releases one/ backdoor!
There had been no knocking at the back door. The dog was asleep. The dog was never vivified. Viv thought the dog lazy. Dottie thought the dog dead.
Did he try the backdoor? Asked Dottie. No time he said/ On the run the bugger/ Lymphatic/ lymph vessels/ lymph glands/ lymph/ He is/ Not Adonis/ Not really/ always on the run though/ chasing sneaky toerags, said Viv.
Dottie enjoyed the privilege of citizenship in two worlds. Viv skipped between a myriad of worlds. Dottie was inertial in one until it was time to move to the next. Viv was forever peripatetic. Dottie found comfit in the logic and limitations in the two worlds she sojourned. Viv was perplexed, but extremely happy by the visits of her guests. Dottie was imprisoned by the corporal and temporal. Viv was forever peripatetic.
Will he be back soon? Asked Dottie. Can't really say, said Viv. Reproductive/
Narcolepsy is a funny thing. During lunch I found myself laughing uncontrollably. I would always have to remove a head from off a plate or a nose out of a drinking glass. Narcolepsy has this kind of way of spreading. I too found myself napping when I should have been watching, listening for bowel movement.
paul kavanagh was born in 1971 this accounts for his perplexity with money. H. Langden says:" paul kavanagh cannot sit still, he drinks too much tea, he succumbs to Pascal's melancholy for he is unable to remain quietly in a room." he is happy. his wife is happy. paul kavanagh has been published in Thieves Jargon, Underground Voices, Milk Magazine, LauraHird, Cellar Door, The Layabout, Skive Magazine, Mad Swirl, Zygote in my Coffee, The Lampshade, Girls with Insurance, zafusy Poetry Journal and a few others.