"The rest of the week went by and we never saw the bastard again," I tell the Thai barmaid. "There was no mention of what happened; it was business as usual right up until the day we left. And that's what happened, all of it. Not a word of a lie."
Just then, John comes alive, stands up with drink in hand and proclaims rather loudly, "Hey birthday boy, gift time."
I look around to see what he could have gotten me.
"I didn't actually buy you anything," he says with a laugh. "It's a story, well, rather an ending to this nightmare we've been going through."
I sit back on the stool.
"Right, so what you are forgetting to tell this dear lady is how, as head teacher, I was privy to everyone's personal details. Oh, yes! Furthermore, you have omitted how this morning, before breakfast, I went online in the hotel and uploaded a scanned copy of Dan's passport and a detailed outline of his actions to every English teaching website Google could find."
"Are you serious?" I'm compelled to ask.
"Hell yeah. I know karma will catch up with him sooner or later; I just wanted to give it a little assistance, you know, so it happens sooner rather than later. And besides, I needed something to cheer you up. So, Happy Birthday! Now let's wear some smiles as we drink and eat till we can drink and eat no more, eh?
"Cheers to that!"
"Cheers," he replies, as we bring our drinks together. "Now, that makes for a much better ending to your story, don't you think," he adds with wink.
I smile back at him but deep in my heart I know it's not exactly a perfect ending. I'm not even sure it is an ending at all; Dan, the bastard, is still out there. But for now, I guess, it's the best I'm going to get. I close my eyes and fill my lungs with fresh sea air. Things start to feel a little better. The Thai barmaid giggles. I smile at her and order another round of Piña Coladas.
Andrew Porterfield is a displaced native of Northern Ireland who has spent the past 6 years living, working and travelling in-and-around the Asian Pacific. He currently lives with his fiancÉe in the south of Taiwan.