Refugees from OneNote Planet

– Beginning of Message from the Deep Space Explorations Committee of the Inter-Planetary Council to the Inter-Planetary Council –

Zaaturu has reported a lack of communicating capsules from the Zaaturu Outer Space Probe for the last 73 orbits. Trackers have failed to blip on the Temps-Spatz screens of orbiting satellites for the same duration.

A fragment of new codes recieved has been deciphered as the following:

“… znail zebum ->0*# …
----fwhoosh in ----- T&Cs (&(&^&---kreate--&%^$%kash#$#
volunteers --^$%#&^^_____ need @#%$^ imprezzion ---$#$#$ ---- holo -----!%^$@ ----- Zti___nger ---@#@$#% ---- demandz <><><><> ----- anti-ray ---- dev//>>”

We recommend an alert be sent to all be sent to all planets having Space Committees in our own Quadrant, and also to surrounding Quads. Is this a return of the former pirates? Our Space Debris Research Body has mixed results. We must be prepared if that is the case. We recommend that Zaaturu be granted additional funding to prep for Level 8 of the Holistic Universal Anti-Virus.

This will involve the use of the ‘snail sebum’ mentioned in the fragment caught. Ironically, snails are a dying species on planet 3 of the solar system, so there will be a delay of 4 Uniform Universal Blocks of Time in the development of the Level 8 of the Holistic Universal Anti-Virus.

For the time being, a substitute synthetic complex can be imported from Sushostra, from Quad XYB492. In exchange planet 3 of the solar system will be fined 222444 kilos of gold per six months of the planet’s time, for letting the snail species die out in their macro organic system. This is the amount of gold demanded in exchange by Sushostra for the synthetic complex of snail sebum for our trials of Level 8 of the Holistic Universal Anti-Virus.

– End of Message from the Deep Space Explorations Committee of the Inter-Planetary Council  to the Inter-Planetary Council –