Refugees from OneNote Planet

– Beginning of Message from the Inter-Planetary Council  –

The Karmic Committee of Planet 3 is required to store the gold in a sealed Inter-Planetary Council Container which will be dropped off by the our Inter-Planetary beam on Planet 3 of the Solar System. This Container will be kept in a secure facility, which will be built according to our designation and specifications.

New snails will be beamed down from Sushostra as well. You will facilitate their growth to the utmost of your ability. The growth rate of snails in your macro organic system will reach 2000% per six months, or the gold penalty will be doubled accordingly. There is 0% possibility of negotiations in the required quantities of snail sebum or gold.

You will be informed about the snail sebum collection process in two months of your planet’s time.

The only substance that the Sushostra Negotiations Panel is willing to accept in place of gold is the liquid substance that resembles dark molten gold. It can be ingested by certain organic species of humanoids, and tastes like Venusian dimrias, used to make Martian endives palatable.

From our archives, you ceased to allow the natural production of this organic compound two centuries ago by vaporizing them with synthetic collodium, causing these air-borne, multi-stranded DNA creatures to become extinct.

The Sushostra Negotiations Panel will not accept any synthetic substitutes for this fluid dark gold substance. Nor will they allow any  substances produced by cloned creatures to be sent instead of your yellow metal.

Sushostra has every right to make their demands. First of all, they are not in our Quad. Secondly, they are not obliged to help us. Thirdly, they are only doing this to help prevent a repeat of the earlier situation with the pirates using unscrupulous individuals to re-program populations to destroy their organic resources, so these individuals can pull a lot of energy unfairly from the remaining people.

Sushostra has no obligation to help us, but they are doing this out of their own willingness, and are allowed to set their terms and conditions.

These ‘sanctions’ as you call them are the least your planet can do to attempt to re-equilibrate this section of the galaxy quadrant. If we don’t manage to do it, within a specified time, you will answer to the Galactic Council, and don’t be surprised if the extinction of certain humanoids is ordered by them. Innocent species on your globe will be beamed to habitable planets before this extinction comes into effect. So it’s in your best interest to comply with these requirements before the matter comes to the attention of the Galactic Council.

The Inter-Planetary Council does not regard asking your planet to fulfill these terms as ‘punishment,’ as you term it, but necessary measures to redress the disequilibrium caused by the humanoids of your globe. It’s up to you how you react to this last chance to save your own two-legged species and planet. Create an environment where organic species such as snails and the producers of dark gold fluids can survive, or face your own extinction.

We are not sure we will be able to convince the Central Galactic Council not to vaporize your planet, so we prefer to give you adequate warning. They will not want to waste so many resources, time, and effort in correcting the imbalance caused by your kind. You have violated more than enough clauses with regards to other species of your planet to have been neutralized for good two millennia ago. 

In your place, we would be far less worried about the yellow metal than the continuation of your humanoid species in particular, and your planet in general. The choice is yours.

– End of Message from the Inter-Planetary Council  –