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The Rascal

As a kid from the West End, Andy was called "The Rascal" by some of the more religious types. He came from a family who were once illiterate in English but who still were people of the book.

Running away from Rabbi Hurwitz' cane, he was at least able to think for himself. He would go to the library and read for hours, and his dad, who worked in the Suffolk Deli, would supply him with bread.

One day on a park bench he met Manny Silver. Manny was the no-good of the neighborhood. He was married to an educated woman who wed him because she couldn't resist his good looks (he said) and because he could dance.

Manny used to make his wife Marta steal books from the college bookstore, and he would return them for profit. Since he knew Andy liked to read Manny got him to be a lookout as he figured out which books in the Antiquarian Store had value. And Manny would make off with them.

Andy at the beginning, liked this routine, for it gave him time to read and make some pin money. But then it became boring.

"Manny, I don't want to keep doing this."

"I thought we could get up to New York after having done rural Maine and Vermont. Remember that first edition Frost."

"I almost froze up there, Manny. Only you were hot on that lady in the store; I could tell."

"You're a maniac."

"No, she was... a sex maniac. I could tell. She wanted both of us."

"Go away."

"I mean it. Believe it or not, I've got experience in this sort of thing."

"Well I thought she was okay."

"You want to go back there?"

"No, really, I'm in for the big time."

"You're a hot shot, Manny. But I've got better things to do."

"I've seen you with that woman rabbi."

"Who?"

"The lady in black."

"Manny, she's a librarian."

"Same thing. Isn't her husband the school principal?"

"So what?"

"That means books. I hate those principals; they always give ya the rat hand."

"I don't believe in corporal punishment."

"Do you want me to tell your father about you?"

"Oh, you can't squeal, Manny. I can tell your wife a thing or two."

"So you're in this together with me, kid. Just so long as you stay away from the wife."

"How come? Is she your property?"

"Oh, the great liberal rascal. You know what my wife calls you? Raskolnikov."

"You should talk. You were ready to knock off or knock up the lady in Bangor."

"You think you're a clever pup. Why don't you go into stand-up?"

And that's what Andy did. You've seen him on the late shows and Comedy Central. But how few know of his humble beginnings in the West End.

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