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Dr Katz Psychiatrist
Part 1: True Dreams
Dear doctor
I really enjoy your show
your representations of human
nature are so accurate,
can you please briefly
comment on or interpret
the following recent
dreams & what they
may reveal about me
& my relationship
with my girlfriend?
1
I’m in a bookshop flipping
through an 1834 illustrated
book of the moon (no shit)
tinged brown fantastical images
turning page after page
the train arriving-
2
I’m slowly dancing
holding my wife’s head
to a Barry Manilow
song ‘What the World
Needs Now is Love Sweet
Love’ but it’s not actually
her head I’m holding
she is seating nearby
watching us
3
playing cricket my partner
bowls me a wicked bouncer
& I hit it hard baseball style
in the middle of the bat I watch
the white ball soar- growing smaller
dissolving into the blue & then
re-emerging falling
highlighted against
a steep rocky outcrop
flecked with
orange ochre
4
I accidentally stumble upon
a group practicing yoga sex
legs twisting incongruently into the air
a panting synchronised orgy
a muscly female suggests that if I tongue her
she’ll return the favour
I get down & lick & bob & suck
her sweet virginal hole
eventually dry humping her without success-
she gets up & she is actually a he
he says that he has already blown off nine guys that day
& refuses to suck me off
he recommends a cream to rub on my dick
to prevent infection
I walk to the Chemist
& apply a liberal amount of the substance on my prick
I read the label
& realise the cream is a kind of super glue
which would leave me with a permanent but unfeeling erection-
I find a public toilet
& desperately begin scrapping off the glue in a basin
with the side of a pair of scissors
an old man comes in & starts laughing
5
we have a wild party afterwards-
she is vacuuming the aboveground pool
with an ordinary household vacuum
carrying it above her head
like a World War 2 Marine
a sausage dog is frantically swimming behind her
attached to a chain-
it starts yelping
& then its head gradually submerges
she yells to us to jump in to save it
fully clothed I dive in
my glasses hit the water
all becomes murky
your early considered response
would be greatly appreciated
yours sincerely
Mark List
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